12/27/11 PM

I go out at lunch and can't help but laugh at this scene. These things never work, and this is the first time I have ever seen a technician.

Later, when catching the bus home that night...

See? What did I tell you?

12/21/11 PM

Backdoor bandit driver strikes again. Dude. Nobody's getting off half-way down this off-ramp. You can close the door now. Thanks. Appreciate it.

12/13/11 PM

Every stop sign/stoplight - not at a bus stop, mind you - our driver opens the back door. It's gonna be a long ride...

12/8/11 PM

Corey Hart is back on tonight.

12/7/11 AM

The switchover to new driver routes are always comedic. The new 6:32 morning driver has yet to get the 854 route correct (at least one wrong turn per day) and today sped past a rider at a stop on University. I miss Miss Diva driver #5972.


But the day gets better. Imagine this...Driving down one of the bus-only roads in downtown Minneapolis - Marquette. Approach 5th Avenue - the light rail station stop. "F*cker in a Focus" is parked there at our stop with his flashers on. Let me remind you - no cars are allowed on this part of the road. New 6:32 driver approaches the stop behind the "F*cker in a Focus" and lets off our passengers at that stop. Light tu...rns green. New 6:32 driver goes into the left lane, as she is supposed to, while "F*cker in a Focus" proceeds - flashers still on - driving in the right lane. Just before 6th Street, "F*cker in a Focus" decides to do a u-turn across traffic into the opposite lane of traffic, cutting off new 6:32 driver in the left lane, causing her to light up the brakes. She misses him by probably a half-foot. Who gave this "F*cker in a Focus" a license? Seriously...

12/6/11 PM

This guy drives the articulated bus like it's an Indy car. Dramamine, anyone?

Dude passenger is wearing his sunglasses at night. And looks nothing like Corey Hart. About 5 minutes after I notice this, I realize that "The Sleeper" is also donning shades. It's a fad. I apparently didn't get the memo.

12/2/11 AM

Definitely a new rider. Got on, paid with all quarters, took off two layers of coats, hung them over the chair in front of her, sat on the outside of the seat.

12/1/11 AM

MN237-DXD black Jeep Liberty has a lot of balls cutting off a bus. I almost wish we would have hit the biznatch to teach her a lesson. Meanwhile, all of this mornings passengers will have to live with whiplash today.

11/18/11 AM

The woman in the black/pink - I shall call her the sneezer. At the same time in the trip everyday, she uncontrollably sneezes about 8-9 times in a row. The lady in red...never seen her before. Obviously new, as she's an outside seat sitter. She's lucky it's Friday - we probably won't fill up enough that she's forced to move over.

11/7/11 PM

Miss "I don't need to wait in stinkin' line, get outta my way" and "screw you, I am sitting on the outside of my seat because I don't wanna sit with anyone." What the eff ever, lady...

11/8/11 AM

A lady with the best hair - silky smooth brunette locks - gets on at 73rd everyday. She always greets the driver with a captivating smile and walks down the bus aisle, continuing that smile as she looks for a seat.

Between Mississippi and 63rd, two drivers are pulled over on the shoulder and are out of their cars. One of the drivers is holding onto the collar what looks like a very scared lost dog who is on an extremely busy road. The other driver is on their phone, hopefully talking to the dog's owner.

11/4/11 AM

One lone rotten strawberry to greet us this morning. And the while bus smells like it. Happy Friday.

11/2/11 AM

A lady gets onto a very full bus and a middle-aged man sitting up front immediately gives her his seat, so she doesn't have to stand. The 20-something executive male in the same general location doesn't even flinch as more women get on at additional stops. Is chivalry dying?

10/27/11 PM

Today seems to be the day of motorcyclists with a death wish. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want to take on an articulated bus with of those things. Same dude, twice, zoomed along the side of the bus as it was merging over. The bus, of course, having the right of way. Dipshit.

10/13/11 PM

It's days like these when I am glad to be a bus rider. Beware of an accident clogging 2 lanes at 94 where it hits 694. Yay for busses being able to use the shoulders...

10/11/11 AM

Timing on the lights changed at the corner of Marquette and 5th Street - where the light rail comes in. Now, you're causing traffic to back up around the corner - both busses and cars. Takes a good 5-6 minutes to get through the light now, whereas before, it was more like 2-3. In the bus world, that's a decade.

Even the 766 (illegally) passed using the oncoming two lanes to get ahead of the bus backup. Apparently this driver did it yesterday as well.

Well done, Minneapolis/MN-DOT. Well done.

9/20/11 PM

Wow. My e-mail was answered AND action is being taken? Not. Used. To. This.

Dear Jessica,

Thank you for the comments we received from you recently regarding Route 854. In your remarks, you asked us to assign a larger bus to the northbound trip scheduled at 2^nd Ave S and 7^th St at 4:22 p.m.

We apologize for any inconvenience. We will assign a larger, articulated bus to your trip effective Monday, September 26. We hope that this change makes your commute more comfortable, and appreciate your patience in the meantime.

Again, thank you for your comments and please feel free to contact us again at (612) 373-3333, menu option #3, or complete a Customer Feedback form online at www.metrotransit.org if you have any further questions or concerns.

Thank you for riding Metro Transit.

Sincerely,

K. Thompson

Data Management Analyst

9/13/11 PM

Nice work, Metro Transit. Changed the 4:22 854C from an articulated bus to a regular one. After 3 stops, the bus is full and standing room only. At Northtown, the standers get off and a mass of charter kids get on, causing a bus full of standers again. Great planning guys. Brilliant.

9/1/2011 PM

We got ourselves a predicament...state fair articulated bus thinks it's his road. Our articulated thinks it's his road. Other driver gets out and tells the drivers behind us to back up so we can back up. Good god people...it's not that effing hard. Reason #739 of why I am glad I am not a bus driver.

8/31/11 PM

Just saw a 763 articulated bus pulled over by an unmarked po-po on Eastbound 94. He's not having a good day.

8/31/11 AM

Kamikaze emergency handle guy unfortunately doesn't understand the concept of deodorant and is sitting right behind me. It's going to be a long ride in today.

8/23/11 AM

Why is the 6:32 854 bus late everyday? These guys. Today it was "I don't wanna stand in the rain so I am gonna wait until you almost go past and then turn off my car, lock it, and leisurely stroll across the street." really? I "accidentally" shook my umbrella a bit as I walked past.

8/20/11 PM

I am really enjoying this 5:44 854C driver. Very courteous, friendly, kind of a smartass. My kind of people.

8/16/11 PM

Brand new articulated bus for the 854C? I just don't know what to do with myself...

8/5/11 AM

Notice anything? New bus. Or one that was cleaned extensively. Not. Used. To. This.

As you can see, "Babe" made a reappearance on today's ride. Luckily, I was far enough away to not have to engage in conversation with her. A true win.

7/18/11 AM

Looks like the 854C may be long gone if the Metro Council has their say. Again, decisions being made by people who live in the South burbs and could care less about those in the North burbs. They must talk to MN-DOT? Effers... http://www.metrocouncil.org/meetings/PrelimTransitServiceMapJuly2011.pdf

7/19/11 PM

Sitting in the back of the bus, nearing the end of my route. The girl sitting across from me is a regular - about college age or near that. We drive past her stop that she usually gets off at. About a mile later, she looks up from her phone she's been playing with to look around and see where we are at on the route. She then realizes that we're well past her stop and pulls the bell for the next stop. Not a mistake you want to make on a day like today - when the heat indices are in the 110s.

7/5/11 PM

Dom Deluise gets on the 831. He's obviously been drinking, as he drops about half of his money when trying to pay. He loses a few of his quarters (well, I think he'd already lost them many years before - heh) and can't pay the full fare. He stumbles around looking for the dropped quarters and finally the driver gives in and says that he's good to go. He's thankful, and yaps the driver's ear off until he gets off at 109th.

6/24/11 PM

Short 264C to my car at the St. Anthony Ramp across the river this afternoon. Walk past a bus patron and hear a subtle, very sexual "Mmmhmmm" and watch him not-so-subtly gawk at my backside as I walk past. Classy.

6/9/11 PM

Dozing off on the bus, I awoke to a smell resembling the UWRF lab farm. I'm on 94 just North of downtown. Nowhere near a farm.

6/16/11 PM

I am just a lowly bus rider. You don't have to get all red-carpet and stuff with me. ;) Okay, FINE, so it's left over from the visiting Chicago White Sox. Whatever...

6/17/11 AM

Watched the 6:32 bus drive by so that I could get some additional time chatting with old neighbor Pete. Sierra enjoyed it as well, as she absolutely adores him.

6/20/11 AM

Laughed out loud this morning. As the bus went past the lot in the park next to my townhouse, the "Dad" from the ARLF (always-running-late-family) leaned on his horn of his SUV as the bus drove by, expecting the driver to 1) hear his horn and 2) actually wait for his late ass because he wasn't yet out of his car and going across the street to the bus stop.

Earth-to-ARLF "Dad": the driver isn't going to wait for you if you're running late. You're going to have to catch the next bus if you can't get there on time. That's what the REST of us have to do when we run late to the bus stop. IDIOT.

6/7/11 PM

This bus driver is incapable of braking without causing me to brace myself on the seat in front of me. Stomach, 1. Me, 0.

5/18/11 PM

To sit in the front of the bus, use the front door. To sit in the back of the bus, use either the front or the back door. Don't enter the back door to sit up front. DUH. Disrupt of body traffic flow ANNOYS ME.

5/31/11 PM

The gun show just got on the bus.

6/1/11 AM

I thoroughly enjoy when Officer Tightpants sits on the carpool on-ramp to bust violators. Makes me smile everytime.

5/26/11 AM

I get on the bus this morning, and our friend "Babe" (Twins vendor) is sitting up front. Doreen and I comment to each other - only each other - about the weather and Babe from several rows up joins in on the conversation. For every additional person who gets on the bus, she strikes up some sort of conversation. Eventually, when the seat next to hers is the only one available, a young, nice-looking man gets on and sits next to her and she starts talking with him, her demeanor obviously in a flirtatious kind of way. I almost feel bad for him. Almost.

Some grumpy dood gets on at Northtown, puts in his transfer into the card reader and says something snotty to the bus driver. The card reader holds onto his transfer for a little longer than usual. Finally, when it comes back, he snatches it and stomps towards the back of the bus, talking in tongues. I pray softly that he doesn't sit next to me. Thank God he walks past.

5/18/11 AM

Rode the 6:53 departing 854C today, thinking I'd see Bonny. Instead, I was treated to a beautiful eye candy substitute, aka driver 67203.

On University, an obvious non-regular rider gets on at Osbourne. He pays, leaves his backpack up front, and proceeds to the back of the bus. Um, is there a reason why you're not taking your bag with you to your seat?

5/4/11 PM

Full busses and a lot of unfamiliar faces. That's what happens when gas is hovering around $4/gal.

After Doreen and I hadn't seen our friend 'The Sleeper' at the bus stop for a few weeks, we started to get a little worried. Today, lo and behold, who gets on the bus at Northtown? The Sleeper walks down the aisle and sits in the empty seat between Doreen and I. Apparently, he is getting a ride to school in the morning (instead of taking 3 different busses to get to school) and that is why we haven't seen him. It was fun to catch up.

4/29/11 PM

Rolling (virgin experience) on the 264C this afternoon. I'm glad the NexTrip signs are working today. *insert sarcasm here*

4/28/11 AM

So, which Captain Obvious sign did you miss? The large lit sign saying no turn? The large BUS letters painted on the road in both lanes? 2 idiot offenders - one in mid-Y turn after he tried to turn around and go the way he came. Bonny and I both got a very good chuckle as I got off at my stop on Marquette and 7th.

4/19/11 PM

Lady got on the bus and opened a window. It's 39 degrees outside. Gonna be damn cold on the highway.

4/21/11 AM

Found an empty shot-size bottle of booze at the base of the bus stop sign this morning. I guess that's one way to ease a 55-minute commute.

As a bus rider, you learn to breathe out of your mouth instead of your nose for certain commutes. Today was one of those days. I'm pretty sure I had a cigarette...and I didn't even light up.

4/22/11 PM

Good Friday patron level is about 1/4 of typical. And this is the first available 854C out of downtown.

4/8/11 AM

Happy Friday! Caught the 6:53 departing 854 to ride with Bonny this morning. Walked down to the first stop early so that we could chat before she had to start her route. As we drove past my townhouse, Bonny beeped at a watching Sierra in the basement window.

A couple stops later, a woman (we will call her Babe, because of how many times she said, "That'll do." on the ride downtown) gets on with much effort. She sits down and I help her pay her fare and get a transfer. She starts into how she's working at the Twins game today - opening day - as a vendor. (In my head, I'm thinking, how is she going to get around to sell things if she's barely able to get on the bus?)

"My pants are already dirty, they can't be dirty, they'll send me home"
"You're a Packer fan? Purple pride! I'm a Vikings fan."
"I'm hoping I sell hot dogs. I love hot dogs. I might have a hard time not eating them."

It was a long ride downtown. As we stopped at Hennepin, Bonny turned to me and smiled, saying, "See how I give you content for your blog?"

4/1/11 PM

Kamikaze emergency exit guy is walking around the bus asking to use someone's cell. He luckily found one before reaching me. "BRING ME SOME SHORTS. WHERE? IN THE THIRD DRAWER ON THE RIGHT. THE RIGHT!" Um, really? That was your emergency?

3/31/11 AM

Let Sierra out for a 'relief' before heading out to the stop for the 6:32 bus. Notice that the bus, waiting at the rendevous point for the route to begin, is having issues keeping power. Lights off, interior lights on, front/sign lights on, all lights off, repeat/lather/rinse. I'm thinking: if this is happening while the bus is idle, it could be a potentially long ride downtown... No issues, thankfully, but you could tell that the driver was either 1) new to the route or 2) new completely. Very easily flustered.

3/30/11 AM

Riding the 854 with Bonny this AM. Walked down to the first stop early so that 1) I could be sure to sit shotgun and 2) so that I could talk to her undistracted before she began her route. GPS system wasn't working on the bus, so Bonny had no idea what time to use for her progress. I helped her with the time being displayed on my cell. Arrive at Northtown and see an articulated 854 parked in our normal spot. As we round the corner, see the driver of that bus escorting off a passenger. Pull up behind the artic and have several people board, one of them giving Bonny a heads up about the situation (which I will find out about more later, with a phone call to Bonny - she couldn't go into details while driving). Apparently, this driver is a kamikaze one according to Bonny, and was crazy driver last week when we got our crap snowstorm, passing her erratically.

3/23/11 AM

Welcome, Spring. No? Snow overnight causes driving havoc for the morning commute. 1 hour and 45 minute ride into work on the bus. Our 854 bus caught up to another 854 on University Avenue just before 694.

3/22/11 AM

Rode shotgun with Bonny this morning. Bus almost stalled at 105th and University. Bonny pulls over and tries to determine the issue, finally finding a gear (D3) that works and keeps us going. Cold, rainy day causes all of Bonny's windows to fog up badly. On I-94, I stand up and wipe off the passenger-side window and door windows so that she can change lanes and take the 4th street exit into downtown.

3/18/11 AM

Rolling on the 6:32 854 with today's driver, one of my faves, The Whistler. Broke out into a morning whistling tune around 111th until his turn at 105th.

3/16/11 AM

Rolling on the 854 this morning with a familiar face...Bonny! Riding shotgun to re-familiarize her with an old route.

3/8/11 AM

Rode the 6:32AM departing bus for the first time in over a week. Doreen welcomed me back at the bus stop, asking how my trip was. The snowmobile coat lady got her haircut - shorter, but still with the late-80's "poof bangs" action. The blonde woman that gets on at 113th almost didn't make it this morning, sprinting for the last 1/2 block. The bus driver couldn't decide to leave her behind or wait for her, inching through the intersection slowly and stopping just past it to wait for her. The Sleeper gets off at Northtown and is confronted by a man - not sure what the discussion is about, but looks somewhat heated, at least from the perspective of the man.

3/9/11 AM

As I walk out to the bus stop, The Sleeper sprints back towards the apartment complex, leaving his bag in the snowbank at the bus stop. Apparently, according to Doreen, he grabbed the wrong set of money from his mom, which was not enough for that day. As The Sleeper sprints back with a minute to spare before the bus arrives, Doreen asks him why he was talking to the cop at the Northtown Hub yesterday morning. "Cop?", The Sleeper asks. Apparently, the guy that scolded The Sleeper about his sleeping habits that cause the sideways seats to be muddy/wet for those that get on at Northtown is a Minneapolis detective. Heh.

3/9/11 AM

Talked with Doreen for the last few blocks of the bus ride. Told her I again woke myself up from snoring. She said, "Well, besides you and Tom (Yay! Name of cute, piercing blue-eyed long-haired guy!), I don't know anyone else on here. And I've gotten to the age where I just don't care anyway." I like her - she's my kind of people. As we got off the bus, she talked about how she was amazed at how many people put their makeup on while riding the bus. I told her I had a blog posting related to just that. At least I'm not alone in this fascination.

3/10/11 AM

Went from Metro Transit's fastest driver last Thursday PM to their slowest driver this morning. I can run faster than this. And I don't run.

2/10/11 AM

This is what the bus looks like when the driver has no idea where he is going and needs to turn around multiple times and retrace his steps. Flustered, the driver opens up the back door accidentally at the next few stops.

2/4/11 AM

Beautiful colorful morning sky at this morning's bus stop. Advantage to taking the last available bus heading downtown...daylight.

2/3/11 PM

Warm sunlight through the window + Cushy-topped bus seats = Snoring on the bus. Guilty.

2/3/11 AM

Two women putting makeup on during the ride this morning. And an emptier bus (on the space-stupid-designed bus, yet) than usual. Everyone's running late?

At Northtown, B.O. dude gets on and sits in the seat in front of me. At least I don't have to deal with his breath like last week when he sat with me. The smell from behind is still potent, but not as bad.

1/20/11 PM

Take the 4:52 departing C Northbound. As we're in the neighborhood that all new drivers (and substitutes) get confused in, driver misses her turn. Patron pulls the buzzer and lets her know that she missed a turn and that she's going down the wrong road, away from where he needs to get off. Driver insists she is driving the right direction. 2 continue to argue their points and finally driver stops and lets patron off, a good distance from where he really should be disembarking. As he gets off, driver shakes her head.

Really? You're the one who was wrong, missy...

1/20/11 AM

I laugh every morning at The Sleeper, who dons cowboy boots at this time of year. He slips and balance-checks all the way to the bus stop but never falls. The dude is a freakin' Weeble.

1/18/11 AM

Ghost of Christmas Future on this morning's bus. Coat he is wearing smells distinctly of skunk. Don't they hibernate right now?

1/11/11 PM

Thank YOU douchebag Volvo SUV for driving illegally down the bus-only road at mach-9 and splashing slush on all the bus-waiters.

1/11/11 AM

Typically, on the 854, when we arrive at the Northtown Transit Hub, we have at least 5-10 people get on the bus. In my almost 2 years of riding, I've never gotten to the Northtown hub and had NO ONE get on the bus. Today was that day. In total, only about 18 people got on for the entire ride today - it was a very empty bus. Being an icky drive day with snow overnight, this is even more surprising.

1/4/11 PM

Ahh. The mixed smell of cigarette, BO and popcorn(?) from passenger behind me. And I am really congested, so it HAS to be strong.